“You Cannot Be Friends with Everyone” and Other Lessons from 2016

“You Cannot Be Friends with Everyone” and Other Lessons from 2016

A work setting can teach you much about yourself and your life. In my current role at a company I am very fond of, I have had the opportunity to experience many growth opportunities which has ultimately allowed me to learn more about business and also about myself.  Here are a few lessons gained which, oddly enough, aren’t new and yet still seem to resurface time and time again especially after a period of transition.

1)    You cannot be friends with everyone.  This was a tough lesson especially for the ‘people pleasing nature’ that I have carried throughout my life.  Shared goals and individual goals can conflict, causing behaviours to change in potentially negative ways.  Sometimes friends can become destructive critics….and that’s…..okay!  Your real friends wouldn’t change and would challenge you to grow…know who these folks are and invest your time with them.

2)      Diplomacy has a limit!  Being altruistic is noble…..but challenging.  Yes, most times, especially in a work setting, conflict should be used as fuel to seek a better solution.  Yet, there will also be individuals where a diplomatic approach will prove to be useless and perhaps a more direct approach may be necessary.  **note, still trying to figure this one out**

3)      Taking care of yourself is a way of taking care of the work that you do.  As busy a year as it has been, I have made a conscious effort to invest in my health and be active as much as possible.  I have also made a bigger effort to create positive memories for my family and feed my heart this way (morning tantrums being the exception).  By investing in health and family, we are essentially investing in our quality of work.  The other way I have also been investing in myself is by journaling to capture the lessons and blessings of each day. 

4)      Bad Days come and go.  Find a group of friends who you can safely vent with, breathe, go for a walk, workout, whatever you do…..try to get rid of that negative load.  Realize that we all have down days..

The Stranger: “How have things been going?”
Dude: “Oh, you know, strikes and gutters, ups and downs.”

(Big Lebowski)

Hope you have found this helpful and please understand, though my journey is very different than yours, we all do experience similar opportunities for growth.  Make a conscious effort to seek the lessons from the day (ahem….like this post) and create a better day tomorrow!

#OnwardForward

Gautam

My Bucket of Motivations

Not to be confused with a bucket list, a ‘bucket of motivations’ is a list of reasons why you want to accomplish a particular goal.  In past posts, I have written about goals not being end points but successful habits that help you continue on the journey of health, wealth and happiness.

The concept of a ‘bucket of motivations’ came to mind as I was at the gym, running on a treadmill.  The gym initially was a reason for me to get in shape, but has evolved to becoming so much more to me.  My bucket of motivations for going to the gym not only include looking and feeling good, but to also relieve stress and surround myself with people who are on a similar journey.  If I have had a stressful day at work, the gym will help me release some tension.  If I feel I need to get in shape, going to the gym will help me validate that I’m actually working on it instead of doing nothing.

I’m currently taking some courses towards my MBA through a distance education curriculum that requires some serious self-discipline.  My bucket of motivations for taking my MBA and studying hard includes learning more about business and furthering my career but also for being a positive role model to my kids and showing them that education is something we need to value.  I have a vision of being at my convocation ceremony with my daughters and wife in the audience cheering me on. 

Think of a bucket of motivations as a few key reasons why you should do anything positive and that you would need to pull from to motivate you to stay on track from your goals.  These motivations do not have to be related to one another aside from the fact that they are motivating you to achieve a particular goal/habit.    And as always, I would recommend the use of a journal to help uncover these motivations and to help keep them in mind while you work towards a healthier, wealthier and happier self!

Happy New Year, everyone!!

#bucketofmotivations

Gautam

Make your day a 10!

Make your day a 10!

A few years ago, I sat in an 'Intro to Coaching' session where the speaker challenged us to evaluate our lives on a scale of 1 to 10 based on several subjects including Health, Wealth, Self-Development, Family, Friendships, etc.  After we put a number down, we were then asked to think about what we needed to do to take that number up a notch.  Example.  If I gave myself a 7 for health, what would I need to lose or incorporate into my day to make that an 8.  It was a powerful exercise and I revisited this idea from a journaling point of view.

Here's how....
At the end of the day, I write down each subject, (example. Health) and  I rate myself on the subject based on how I felt I did today, and then write down why I gave myself this 'mark'.  Then I would write down what I could do tomorrow to make myself get a 10.  And this is where the right side of the brain comes into play.   :-)

The effects of this activity are amazing.  Not only because of the great ideas generated, but it has begun to train my mind to continuously challenge how I would rate my day and I how I could make it better throughout the course of my day.  A friend of mine used to say 'the past does not equal the future' and by catching myself in the day, I can let a day that began wrong, end of right.  We may not be able to control everything, but we will definitely have a stronger part in determining our destiny.

What are some ways that you are making your day a 10?